


do what you feel now

by momothespicy (momothesweet)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Autistic Ushijima Wakatoshi, DFAB reader, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Oral Sex, Other, Reader-Insert, Smut, Vaginal Sex, gender neutral reader, there's a lot of cutesy conversationy stuff in this just roll with it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-19
Updated: 2018-10-19
Packaged: 2019-08-04 07:57:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16342868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/momothesweet/pseuds/momothespicy
Summary: Your regularly-scheduled date with Ushijima is compromised. You try to make it up to him.A sequel toRespectful Redfrom theSeven Minutes in Heavenseries.





	do what you feel now

**Author's Note:**

> Autistic Ushijima Wakatoshi is important and I love him very much (you should too)
> 
> Very special thanks to [Dovie/lowcarbzeros](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lowcarbzeros/pseuds/lowcarbzeros) for reading over the fic and giving me suggestions to make this as organic as possible. If you haven't read _we created a small thing_ yet, please do yourself a favor and put yourself through the pain and bits of joy of being the mother of Kuroo's baby.
> 
> Hope you all enjoy this fic! Listen to some [MGMT](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MmZexg8sxyk) to get into the mood. :)

Ever since that night of the party, you’ve made the efforts to continue seeing Ushijima. The more you see him, the more you’ve come to find that that stoic demeanor, those clipped responses, and the odd fixation with volleyball are a product of someone who functions a little differently than others. You’ve never brought it up with him and neither has he. Then again, why would either of you? You like him very much and he likes you, too.

As such, Ushijima’s made some room in his life for you. Every Thursday for the last few months, you’ve come to volleyball practice simply to observe, or hang out, or assist the coaches if they ever need an extra hand. It’s a routine you both enjoy since it means holding hands back to his dorm and kissing each other good night. Things have been slower these days; no trysts in the closet nor heavy petting. This pace is better.  _ Way _ better. Though, you do miss the heated contact that made you feel, even for just seven minutes, that you were his. You’re not sure when’s a good time to bring it up.

On your way to the gym for that Thursday practice, a stranger bumps into you. After a quick apology, you go on your way, only to find that your phone had been stolen right out of your pocket. It takes a lot of running around campus and a couple of friends plus security to help you, but by the late evening, you catch the sneaky thief and your phone is back in safe hands.

Unfortunately, you missed the practice. And you’re not sure how Ushijima will feel about that.

You head for his dorm anyway, because texting him feels worse and you don’t want to go home knowing that something ruffled tonight’s activities. He answers right away and you can’t completely tell by the flat look on his face if he’s mad at you or not.

“You didn’t come tonight,” Ushijima says.

“I know,” you say. “I’m sorry. My phone got stolen and I had to get it back.”

“I see. Are you hurt?”

You shake your head. “I’m fine.”

He nods. Then, as if you both were having a casual conversation, continues, “We had a practice match with Hosei. They had a middle blocker that consistently stopped my spikes.”

You inhale sharply. You know he tends to do this and you know he doesn’t mean any harm. It’s frustrating at times and you do your best to understand what he means. You take the moment to process his comment, then nod. “I’m sure that was a tough match, then?”

“It wasn’t. We won in two sets.”

“Oh. I’m sorry I didn’t get to see it.”

“You missed it.”

“I know,” you say again, sighing. “I want to make it up to you. Can I still hang out with you here?”

You reach for his hand and he doesn’t resist. Ushijima looks down at your joined hands, then back at you, then brings you inside. You smile warmly and stand on your toes to kiss his cheek. He smiles back and does the same to you.

As you curl up in his bed with him, like you would when you do your movie nights on weekends, he talks more about the match. While it sounds like he’s trying to guilt trip you about not showing up, you’re able to catch the fact that you didn’t see his success on the court. Judging by how he accounts the players and the strategies, you can tell he wanted you to see all of it. Stupid pickpocketer.

Once he takes a breath, you press closer to him, placing your hand over his heart as you look up at him. “I really wish I could have seen it all. But you know it wasn’t my fault, right? I want you to understand that. I had an emergency.”

He studies your face for what feels like forever before answering, “I understand.”

“Okay.” And you leave it at that. Ushijima holds you just like this, close, silent save for the breaths and his heartbeat so close to yours. It’s always been comfortable. As the evening passes, Ushijima stirs and he says your name. 

“Do you remember the party?”

You laugh softly and shift so you can lie on top of him. You’re like a feather when he’s a hulking mass of volleyball player under you. “Of course I do. That’s how we met.”

Ushijima’s hands begin to wander, rubbing your sides like you told him how you like it, then over your back. Something feels off when he doesn’t respond right away. You can see him thinking about what to say next, picking the right thing to say and making sure it comes out the right way. You know what’s happening and yet you still raise your eyebrows when he outright says, “I want to touch you like that again.”

In the past, you’ve talked with him about setting up boundaries to avoid discomfort and overall awkwardness. Most of that has dissipated over time, as Ushijima has grown to figure out what you like and what you don’t like. And he still remembers that you liked it when he touched you in that closet.

Biting your lip, you lean in for a kiss. He kisses back, careful not to press too hard and not to swallow you whole. “I want you to,” you whisper. “You made me feel so good that night.”

“I did?”

You nod, kissing a touch harder and swiping your tongue over his lip to part them. Ushijima growls and you can already tell that this is going to be good. Your voice remains soft, your touch gentle when your fingers crawl up his neck. “If we spent more time in that closet, I’m pretty sure everyone would hear me come.”

From the look in his eyes, something awakens in Ushijima, something you haven’t seen in a while. It arouses and intrigues you at the same time. As you admire his face, he suddenly switches your positions and flops you onto the bed. You yelp at the quick movement, looking up at him while he looks down at you and holds you by your wrists. That gaze wakes you up, too, a heat slowly coming up to take over your body.

“May I?” he asks you. “I don’t want to hold back anymore.”

You nod. “Please, Wakatoshi.”

Ushijima charges out the gates. His lips are searing when they touch yours, all the while working effortlessly to take some of your clothes off. Now that you two aren’t surrounded by noisy partygoers and alcohol, it’s easier to get things out of the way so his skin can touch yours and you can moan all you like. He shifts his lips from your own to your neck, nails dragging up your bare sides and coming up to play with your nipples. You wrap your legs around him as more heat courses through you and you’re hot to the touch.

“You’re so pretty,” he says when he shifts down to kiss your chest. “I could kiss you all night.”

You giggle and reach down to push his hair back. Ushijima’s ridiculously handsome with his mouth around your nipple. “I hope you do more than kissing. There’s a lot we can do tonight.”

He makes a noise of agreement and continues his descent down your body, leaving a kiss along the way as if he’s the world’s greatest (and sweetest) lover. So much of your assumptions about him were wrong; as rough as he can get on the court, he’s able to rein it all in, even if he’s only doing it for you. A part of you hopes you can help him release more of that energy tonight.

The rest of your clothes come away from your skin and Ushijima’s all but found a home between your legs. Large fingers press against your inner thighs, drawing them apart to expose your arousal. He tests the waters by nipping your inner thigh. You twitch and lift your hips ever-so-slightly to entice him, to give him the approval he needs.

And when he catches on, he doesn’t hold back. His tongue goes right to your wet skin, kissing you as if he’s kissing you up top. You try to press your thighs towards his head, but he doesn’t allow you to, not by an inch. Your moans fill his room, all the while you hang onto his hair and guide him to where you like his tongue the most. Ushijima is a fast learner, figuring out your body like a volleyball play and making the effort to be the absolute best. The way he kisses, the way he licks, sucks you like he’s  _ certain _ he’ll get you to come. You couldn’t ask for anyone better.

“Fingers,” you half-moan, half-suggest to him as he sucks the most sensitive part of your body. “I’m gonna, I want to--”

Ushijima stops abruptly, coming up from between your legs, much to your dismay. You whine at the loss of stimulation, so close to getting him to taste you. Though, instead of leaving you completely empty, he does indeed insert one finger inside you. He moves it lazily as his face levels with yours, kissing you so you can taste yourself on his tongue and you can hide your moans. When he pulls back, his voice sounds deeper than ever, dripping with that lust you’ve asked him to stow away for this long, “I don’t want you coming on my fingers.”

Despite his unintentionally-domineering statement, Ushijima’s making it very difficult for you not to follow through, especially when he inserts another finger. You arch your back and curl your toes, teetering between desperate and needy. “Wakatoshi,” you whine, “I need it. Please?”

Ushijima’s so close to pressing your g-spot when he finally pulls his fingers out. Instead of complaining, though, you enjoy the show above you. Watching him take the rest of his clothes off and put on a condom is an uncanny kind of satisfying. Like many things that are very on-brand with him, Ushijima is focused, so focused that when he comes back to hover over you, he pushes about halfway inside without proper notice and you cry out in pain at the all-too-sudden stretch. 

Immediately, he pulls back out, panic in his eyes and ready to step back as far away from you as possible. You shake your head quickly and bring him down for a kiss, reassuring him that you’re going to live and this isn’t something that will completely turn you off from him. Perhaps a little more guidance is in order.

“I’m sorry,” he says, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. He still tries to pull away from your hands on his cheeks. “I hurt you.”

“Wakatoshi,” you whisper before another kiss. “You just need to go slower. It’ll be better for me and you.”

“This is different.”

“No, it’s not. Hey.” You tap his cheek so he can look at you. “This doesn’t change how much I like you. I  _ want _ you to make me feel good. I want this to feel good for you, too.”

You allow him the silence he needs, and he responds with stroking your sides, moving slowly like he always does, like you’re fine art. It’s what he’s comfortable doing. “Show me.”

You smile wide, then slide one hand between you two to start stroking him. He grunts. “Go slow. It’ll feel better that way. Then you can move faster.”

Ushijima nods. A few more reassuring kisses and you guide him back inside you. This time, he listens to your soft words, the kisses around his ear, the moans that tell him that you feel much, much better. You tap his shoulder once he’s in deep enough that it won’t hurt, and you give yourself the second to get used to the stretch.

“Is this better?” he asks.

You attempt to bring your legs around his massive torso, nodding. “Yes--mm, you’re so good, Wakatoshi. You’re so good to me.”

He kisses your neck and starts to move when you say so. The bed heats up along with you as he moves, rocking the frame and holding you by the hips once he finds that rhythm. His confidence builds up, enough to lift up and hold you firmly to keep you right where you are. You moan your praises throughout, drawn to how he hits you just right, pressing into that sweet spot that gets you closer to coming. He picks up on your pleasure when you moan louder and when you let go to put a hand between your legs. He bats it away to rub you himself.

“I want to do this,” he huffs, moving faster. “I want to feel you.”

It only takes a few more thrusts and fingers pressing harder to give him what he wants. You tighten up quickly around him and come, soaking the condom and bouncing as much as you can between him and the mattress. Ushijima doesn’t take much longer, either, pushing in right to that limit and coming while you babble his name. His moans make your chest rumble, your bones quake. Nobody’s ever made you feel like this.

All too soon, Ushijima pulls out and throws away the condom. You whine once more, holding out your arms and beckoning him to come back to bed. He doesn’t catch your request, lifting you up suddenly to hold you bridal-style. You’re not opposed to the contact, but you could definitely drop back into bed right about now and fall asleep.

“We need to shower,” he says, kissing your cheek.”I can carry you.”

Unsurprisingly, he’s right. You put your arms around his neck and lean into him, eyes closed and barely voicing an “okay.”

You like Ushijima very much. He really likes you, too.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Comments, kudos, feedback and phone insurance are greatly appreciated!
> 
>  
> 
> [My Tumblr](http://peachofwork.tumblr.com)


End file.
